Training your dog is necessary to enjoy a happy, healthy relationship with your dog. But what does dog training actually look like, and what is the end goal?
There's a lot of confusion about what's mandatory when training a dog or puppy. Quite a few dog trainers have a Mandatory List of Ten Command(ments) your dog needs to know, and the wrath of the furies upon you if you deviate from their dog training guidelines.
But most of these rigid dog and puppy training regimens don't take into account the most important parts of a dog training program: livability and attainability.
So before even starting on puppy kindergarten or focusing on an intensive dog training class, let's begin at the most important part: what you desire your partnership with your dog to look like.
1. Remember Who's Dog You're Training
A frequent question I get while training a dog is if it's okay for a dog to sleep on the bed.
We forget that we aren't training our dogs to fit into a random household; we are training our dogs to fit seamlessly into our household. And each house is different.
Dog rules that make sense in my house would be irrational in another person's house.
2. Don't Forget Why You're Training Your Dog
No, I don't mean why you're training your dog, but why you want your dog trained to do this specific thing.
For example, I can't tell you how many of my clients want their dog trained during a walk to sit down at intersections before crossing the road. When I ask them why, the most common answer I get is, "So my dog knows not to run across the street if they ever get off-leash".
This is wrong for two glaring reasons:
1. You haven't trained your dog to not dart across the street, you merely trained them that when on a leash, on a controlled walk with you, we briefly stop and sit before proceeding forward across the street.
2. If your dog gets off leash and doesn't have the impulse control to come when you call them, it's a pretty safe bet that your dog's "training" to sit at intersections will suddenly kick in and they will patiently wait at the first intersection for you to calmly retrieve them.
So the "why" you're training your dog to sit at intersections doesn't add up.
I have never trained any of my dogs to lie down on command - it literally serves no purpose for me. They all seem to pick it up eventually, but I don't actively train them to do it.
However, my dogs know that "to me" means not only come but sit down on their designated left or right side of me (sooooo much easier when it's time to feed, put leashes on, or have them a heel without a leash).
My dogs have also been trained to do stupid tricks, simply because it's a great bonding experience while learning, and it makes me laugh.
Example: I trained Sparta to hold random objects in her mouth while I took a picture every day for 3 months. I still find joy in these photos, years after she's gone. You can find them here.
So while there are quite a few things we can all agree your dog needs to know (sit, stay, come, and "no"), there is quite a bit that's open to interpretation. Train your dog according to your lifestyle, not someone's generic interpretation of your life.
3. Your Dog Training Expectations Aren't Matching Reality
So you want to train your dog to heel off-leash. What's that going to cost you in terms of time and effort?
That depends, and in order to get that answer, we need to take a look at reality.
If you've already got a dog with great impulse control, and who reliably comes when you call, great! Let's get started off-leash!
If you have a dog with whom you're currently cleaning up the impulse control, but making great strides, it will take a little longer to start off-leash training.
If your dog is currently dog reactive on a leash and has high prey drive, the answer is maybe never.
We tend to mix up another person's reality with our own. Yes, the 15 year old Golden Retriever down the street walks without a leash, so why can't yours? Well, to put it bluntly:
They have a different dog; and/or
That dog has a different owner.
It's okay that your dog doesn't win the Westminster Dog Show, or isn't a therapy dog like your friends. Comparing your dog to what another dog can do is a dangerous path, and you will end up resenting your dog's inability to be another dog.
Instead, compare your dog to who they were a year ago. A month ago. Sometimes it's a day-by-day comparison. And while your dog's training journey isn't ever linear, you should see it should be trending steadily upwards.
But sometimes the problem is that your dog isn't owned by someone else. You're comparing how another person handles your dog, or how someone else seems to just be a natural dog person. You think that since other people effortlessly walk your pooch who happens to be dog reactive, you should be able to walk your dog with the same amount of ease. By focusing on how well others are doing, rather than keeping your eye on the goals you've achieved, you are again setting yourself up for failure.
Look at it like this: if you have a goal of winning an Academy Award, because so many other people have, you have to take a look at who you are, and who is your handler/manager.
If you've never even taken an acting class, or have only landed roles as an extra in your high school musicals, there is going to be a lot of work to be done to train you to be an actor.
But your agent is key, too. Are they putting you in front of the right people and in the right situations?
Academy Award winner Meryl Streep's agent didn't put her name into running when casting decisions were made for the next Wonder Woman movie. Why? Because her agent wasn't playing to Streep's strengths, rather than pinpointing current strengths and gradually increasing them. It would have ended in a really awful movie.
And that segues right into....
4. You're Ignoring Your Dog's Natural Timeline
I recently trained 4 large dogs, all in the same household. During our initial dog training session, I worked on goals for the dog's owner. She stated she wanted to be able to walk all four of them at once in the morning to save time.
Considering she couldn't keep them from fighting during mealtimes and 2 of them had fear aggression towards other dogs, walking all four on a leash together was pretty much going to look like the ending of Braveheart.
The natural timeline of dog training starts with dog behavior. And dogs whose behavior is compromised is indicative of three things:
Lack of impulse control
Anxiety/fear
They love you, but they don't trust you (or worse, fear you)
It was obvious this woman hit all three with her dogs. None of them had any impulse control, they all had anxiety, and there was no trust to be found in that household. Yet her goal was to walk all four of them together.
She had lost sight of the actual goal: working to build bonds of communications and trust with her dogs, thus bringing impulse control and eliminating their anxiety.
I gave her a game plan to efficiently wear out her dogs as we work through her dogs' behavioral issues together. She's currently able to safely walk two at a time, an I am SO DAMN PROUD of her.
Dog behavior, then dog training. That is always the order.
5. You and Your Dog are a Team
Okay, this one always breaks my heart. Many years ago, I was working with a senior citizen who adopted a puppy. The puppy turned out to be a very energetic, but loveable dog. That wasn't a problem - Cynthia was exceptionally active, hiking for miles every day with her dog.
Until severe arthritis hit her 5 years later.
Her dog was still just as active, so this woman popped as much aspirin as she could stomach (and then some) and would painfully hike the same route with her dog that they had before her knees betrayed her.
When I asked her why, she said because her dog deserved it, and that was how she showed her dog she loved him.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but love should never involves pain.
I told her that if her dog understood how much pain she was in while she was hiking, her dog would be horrified. He loved her just as much when they were playing fetch as when they were sitting together on the couch. He loved her hiking and he loved her on short strolls.
And that love she has for him shows through every time she Piloted his fearful behavior during thunderstorms. Every time she took him to the vet for his annual checkup. Her love was apparent when she didn't share her dinner with him (he was putting on weight), but when she carefully cut up carrot sticks to give him a treat. By helping Cynthia see other healthy ways she could show her dog she loved him, and still provide for all his needs and most of his wants, she didn't feel trapped into painful walks anymore.
Love isn't about sacrifice, nor is it about giving and giving until you're resenting who you should love. And while Cynthia was an extreme example of giving until it hurts, there are plenty of other examples.
Perhaps you have a dog training goal of running with your dog 3 miles every morning. An attainable goal! But if you've hit that goal, but now are pregnant, it's okay to pause that goal or adjust it as your new baby adds an different type of amazing chaos into your world.
Maybe your goal is to teach your dog agility, but after 2 classes, you realize this is actually rather boring. Why would you stick with it just because your dog loves it? You're a team!
Discover something that you can partner with, not that one of you loves, but the other merely endures.
Mixing Dog Behavior with Dog Training Goals
Whether you are starting at the beginning with your dog's current behavior problems, or you are ready to advance to dog training, have specific goals in mind. Make sure they fit your lifestyle as well as your dog's personality, and encompasses both your strengths and weaknesses.
Do an honest assessment: are your current dog training goals wasting time? Are they taking into account your needs in this dog/human relationship? Or do they make you feel like part of a team working towards the same goal?
Training your dog without a goal is fundamentally flawed, and leaves rudderless, paddling in circles trying to work around your dog's behavior. By starting with a plan of action, and setting manageable dog training goals, you are starting ono the path to success.
At Darwin Dogs, we understand the frustration of dog owners when trying to train their dogs, which is why we created a dog training plan that focuses on simple, effective, force-free methods.
Because every dog deserves to be the Best Dog Ever.
Comments