top of page

10 Ways You're Causing Your New Dog or Puppy Anxiety

Congratulations on getting a new dog or puppy! However, before starting the training process, it's important to ensure that your dog is not feeling stressed. Learn the 10 reasons your new dog may be overwhelmed, and discover how to help alleviate your dog's anxiety.


Brown and white puppy who is anxious

You've just adopted a new dog or puppy, and you're so excited to begin your new life together. But before you head out into the world with your new pup do all the dog training and tricks in existence, take a moment to check on your dog's mental health: are they overwhelmed?


Discover the top ten ways that many new dog owners unintentionally cause stress for their dogs, and learn how to prevent overwhelming your new family member.


1. You Automatically Assume Your Dog Already Trusts You


Your dog may already love you, and I guarantee your new puppy already thinks you're pretty amazing, but that doesn't mean they trust you.


I love my daughter River, but she just got her license and I think we're going to die.




Even if your new pup does trust you in most circumstances, that doesn't mean they have absolute faith in you yet. You need to build a little bit of a history together, and that takes time, and Piloting. Learn more about the Piloting Method of dog training here.


2. You're Forcing Eye Contact With Your Dog


There is a reason your mom taught you not to stare: it's rude. But if you've done dog training with me you know that rude is actually a nice way to say "aggressive". By forcing eye contact, you are requiring your dog to do something they aren't comfortable with.


There are always some exceptions #BorderCollieLife, but for the most part, a dog new dog will not want to rustle any feathers, and will not be happy with forced eye contact; that takes trust.


3. You're Trying To Make Your Anxious Dog A Socialite


No, your new rescue doesn't want to meet your Great Aunt Martha, or your second cousin's boyfriend. Let your dog build up some trust and comfort with a few select people, and then start to branch out their social circle.


How long does that take? It depends upon the dog or puppy. It could take a few minutes or months (looking at you, puppy mill rescues). Let your new pup guide these interactions. If your new dog is still acting timid around you, now is not the time to take them to a family gathering. Take it slow, and your puppy's social battery will hold a charge longer and longer each time. Rush it, and you're going to be trying to work with an anxious dog who doesn't trust you anymore.


4. Your New Dog is a Rebound for Your Previous Dog


So your previous dog (rest their soul) loved going to the dog park and playing with the other dogs for hours. Maybe they liked playing fetch. Perhaps they really enjoyed snuggling on the sofa.


Point is that dog was one in a million. Just like your new dog. Don't try to force fun on your new dog. It's okay if your new Lab doesn't like water like your last one did, or if your new Border Collie hates tennis balls. Learn your new dog's love language (snuggling? frisbee?) rather than trying to turn them into Previous Dog 2.0.


Woman sitting on beach with her dog

5. You're Trying to Leash Train Your Dog Too Quickly


Yes, most dogs and puppies do enjoy going for a walk, but sometimes it can be overwhelming, as was the case with my Border Collie, Arwen. Her previous owners had restricted her movements to a kitchen, and that was it.


So the first time she was put on a leash (as I led her out of her previous home) she screamed and urinated on the floor. We hadn't even made it down their hallway yet.


Small dog on red leash

I respected Arwen's anxiety, and didn't force her into situations where she was terrified. By gradually easing her into leash walking, her trust in me grew and our first "real" walk was very anti-climatic, which is always a good thing, but more importantly, showed that I was trustworthy in her eyes, and wouldn't force her to move past her comfort zone.


6. Your Other Dog is Stressing Them Out


"He just wants to play!", you say to your new rescue dog as your current dog is chasing them and wrestling them to the ground.


3 large dogs playing together on grass

While you know your dog's intent is to play, it only counts as play if both parties are playing, and your new dog most certainly is not. They are overwhelmed and really need you to step in to bring a little calm back to the situation.


Give them some time, and don't let your current dog bully your new dog into "just playing".


7. Your New Puppy is Homesick & Anxious Without Mom


Small red puppy being crate trained

Your new puppy was fine all day: running, playing, and having a great time....until nighttime came. Suddenly there's crying and whining, with no end in sight.


You didn't do anything wrong - your puppy just misses the safety and security of their mom. Rather than just chucking them into their cage and forcing them to "cry it out", make the separation between fun-time and bed-time a gradual thing.


Start earlier in the evening, well before bedtime, by having some wind-down time in the crate, and soften this blow by giving them something very interesting to do (a kong is perfect). Hang out with them as they enjoy their treat, but getting up and leaving every so often before coming back. Gradually start to turn out lights/cover their crate, coming back every so often so they don't ever feel truly abandoned.


By making this separation more of a gradual thing, rather than a sudden transition, you are slowly expanding thresholds.


Also, every puppy (including mine!) has found the first few nights easier with a Snuggle Puppy. My Hazel learned almost immediately that when her Snuggle Puppy was turned on, it was time to sleep, saving both of us many sleepless nights.


8. You're Giving Your New Dog or Puppy Too Much Activity


Yes, activity and exercise are integral for a well behaved dog and happy puppy, but there is such a thing as too much, especially for a new member of the family. Even if your new pup is thriving, and an absolute social butterfly, hitting stride immediately, not enforcing any down time can lead to a dog who has no "off" switch.


Mandate down time/rest periods for your dog in a quiet, low stimuli location. Give them something calming to do (Kong, chew stick) so they aren't bored, but nothing that adds a lot of energy.


By immediately mandating down time, you are helping your dog acclimate to not constantly needing a stream of stimuli.


9. You're Using Baby Talk With Your New Dog or Puppy

That high-pitched, sing-song voice you're using with your puppy or dog? It sounds like a puppy shrieking in fear. Speak in a normal voice, and keep it calm. No shouting or high energy. Your dog will thank you.


10. You've Been Trying to Bribe/Dominate Your New Dog


I don't know what idiot decided that shock collars were the way to work through a dog's behavior, but they make about as much sense as smacking a kid who's overstimulated or scared.

Shock collars don't train your dog so much as create a dog with Stockholm Syndrome.
Anxious dog hiding under white blanket

Your dog has questions about their new world, and while the answers to some of those questions may be "no", this Q&A with your pup should never involve pain or fear.


On the flip side, if your new pup needs a gentle negative, don't try to bribe your way out of giving an answer. If you don't like your dog jumping on you, give them a negative, don't try to coax them into stopping their behavior by offering a ball (or worse a treat) instead. Don't negotiate or bribe your dog, when what they really need is someone to guide and gently shape their behaviors, making the world a lot less scary.


Alleviate Anxiety: Learning to Focus On Dog Behavior, Not Dog Training


We are all guilty of over-excitement when it comes to getting a new dog or puppy. We focus on "getting them trained" as quickly as possible, when what the actual goal should be is to focus on behavioral aspects, such as anxiety and impulse control. Once those issues have been alleviated, dog training is a breeze!


Struggling with your new dog or puppy's behavior? Click below to and learn how our Piloting Method of dog and puppy training focuses on all your dog's struggles, including impulse control and anxiety.


At Darwin Dogs, we understand the frustration of dog owners when trying to train their dogs, which is why we created a dog training plan that focuses on simple, effective, force-free methods.


Because every dog deserves to be the Best Dog Ever.



Kerry Stack

Darwin Dogs Dog Training, Behavior and Coaching

Northeast Ohio, Greater Cleveland

Post: Blog2_Post
bottom of page